Today's feature is Stacy from My Cancer Scoreboard. I met her through Meaghan, when she recruited me to make a Nana's Box for Stacy. I jumped at the chance! Stacy is currently fighting Melanoma cancer, and has been for over a year. October 15, 2007, was the day my life as I knew it changed forever.
That day my doctor spoke the words "It's cancer."
That day my doctor spoke the words "It's cancer."
When did you find out you had cancer?
I found out I had cancer October 15, 2007. I was currently attending college in Memphis, TN – 700 miles away from my family in Ohio. On my third visit to my doctor, I was referred to a Dermatology Oncologist who diagnosed my Melanoma.
- How did you tell your family and friends?
This is somewhat of a difficult question for me to answer, simply because looking back on the initial situation and my diagnosis, I know I should have went about this differently. As I mentioned, I was away from home at college in Memphis and felt that if I kept it to myself, somehow that meant it wasn’t really happening. You guessed it, at first I didn’t tell anyone. The thought of my family being in Ohio and worrying about me sickened me almost as much as my cancer diagnosis itself – I felt it was my responsibility to protect them. I kept my diagnosis to myself until the end of November - and at this time I only told my immediate family, making them promise not to mention it to anyone else. Coming from a relatively small town I knew how fast news traveled and I was determined that I was not going to be the subject of the town’s lastest gossip. Looking back, I would be devastated if someone in my family was sick and I didn’t know and really wish I would have went about it differently. Following the first of the year, (January, 2008) my determination to keep this all a secret began to fail and my name began to circulate through the gossip at home.
I found out I had cancer October 15, 2007. I was currently attending college in Memphis, TN – 700 miles away from my family in Ohio. On my third visit to my doctor, I was referred to a Dermatology Oncologist who diagnosed my Melanoma.
- How did you tell your family and friends?
This is somewhat of a difficult question for me to answer, simply because looking back on the initial situation and my diagnosis, I know I should have went about this differently. As I mentioned, I was away from home at college in Memphis and felt that if I kept it to myself, somehow that meant it wasn’t really happening. You guessed it, at first I didn’t tell anyone. The thought of my family being in Ohio and worrying about me sickened me almost as much as my cancer diagnosis itself – I felt it was my responsibility to protect them. I kept my diagnosis to myself until the end of November - and at this time I only told my immediate family, making them promise not to mention it to anyone else. Coming from a relatively small town I knew how fast news traveled and I was determined that I was not going to be the subject of the town’s lastest gossip. Looking back, I would be devastated if someone in my family was sick and I didn’t know and really wish I would have went about it differently. Following the first of the year, (January, 2008) my determination to keep this all a secret began to fail and my name began to circulate through the gossip at home.
What was your life like before cancer?
It was hectic, busy, and stressful. I worked full-time as well as attended school full-time. I always had something going on. I thought I was enjoying my life and really believed that I loved the crazy, busy and stressful life I was leading. It really was to the point that I didn’t know what to do with myself without something I had to do. I continuously added things to my schedule and pushed myself harder and harder. When cancer came into my life, I quickly realized that my hectic lifestyle simply was not possible and it forced me to cut back. I slowly came to the conclusion that I had not been enjoying my hectic and stressful life as much as I thought. Cancer helped me realize that a balance was necessary in order to enjoy life and that I could only accomplish so much in a day.
Initially, prior to telling anyone about my diagnosis, my simple determination carried me through. But, I can’t exactly say those times were really the scariest of the scary times so far. During the truly hard and scary times since cancer my family, friends, and even strangers that offer continuous love and support are what give me hope when I find I have no hope at all.
How has cancer changed your life?
The real question, to me, is how has cancer NOT changed my life. Sometimes it’s hard to remember what my life really was like before I was diagnosed. I definitely feel like cancer made me grow up a lot, and very, very quick. It also made me realize that my priorities at the time were not at all in line with what I truly felt was important to me. I see the world in a completely different way. I find myself constantly thinking, “before you judge someone, walk a mile in their shoes.” And how true that really is in life. Do I thank cancer for the “growing up” or the “changes” in my life? Oh no. Not even close, at least not yet. But I do believe that cancer has been a major stepping stone for the positive in my life. When I wake up every day, regardless of how great or how horrible I feel, I am grateful. I wake up with the sole intention of assuring the people that mean the most to me in my life know it, while also staying focused on my priorities – making sure they are lined up as they should be. Cancer has made me a completely different person than I was and I’m still learning how to “fill the shoes” of this new person in positive ways.
The real question, to me, is how has cancer NOT changed my life. Sometimes it’s hard to remember what my life really was like before I was diagnosed. I definitely feel like cancer made me grow up a lot, and very, very quick. It also made me realize that my priorities at the time were not at all in line with what I truly felt was important to me. I see the world in a completely different way. I find myself constantly thinking, “before you judge someone, walk a mile in their shoes.” And how true that really is in life. Do I thank cancer for the “growing up” or the “changes” in my life? Oh no. Not even close, at least not yet. But I do believe that cancer has been a major stepping stone for the positive in my life. When I wake up every day, regardless of how great or how horrible I feel, I am grateful. I wake up with the sole intention of assuring the people that mean the most to me in my life know it, while also staying focused on my priorities – making sure they are lined up as they should be. Cancer has made me a completely different person than I was and I’m still learning how to “fill the shoes” of this new person in positive ways.
How has it changed the relationship between you and your family and friends?
Cancer has changed my relationships mainly in how much more aware and appreciative I have become. My family and friends have done so much for me, more than I could have ever imagined possible. They mean everything to me and I make sure they know it, not part of the time, but all the time. I may be sick and in a horrible, mean, awful mood, but no matter how much I complain or come off in a negative way, I make sure they know the love, compassion and appreciation I have for them is endless.
5 comments:
Best of luck and God bless to Stacy as she fights this!!!
Carrie
I wish Stacy all the luck and love and support that can find its way to her.
And a very Merry Christmas to you and your family!
Hey Stacy, you know I'm here if you need me. It was like that in high school and it's still like that now.
I've known you since you were a little bity baby and you're as beautiful inside as you are out.
May God touch and heal you and allow you to shine your light for others to follow. You go girl...
Hey Stacy, I am so very proud of you! Your web-sites look fantastic and I am glad that you have found a place to put all of your talent to good use. I love you and I cant wait to see you soon!
Shannon
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